The following are a collation of Murphy's law and other truisms, edited with
homebuilders in mind. I apologise for the length, but here they are anyway:
Nature sides with the hidden flaw.
Ralph's Observation:
It is a mistake to allow any mechanical object
to realize that you are in a hurry.
Manly's Maxim:
Logic is a systematic method of coming to
the wrong conclusion with confidence.
MURPHY'S LAW:
If anything can go wrong, it will.
Murphy's Corollary:
Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
Murphy's Corollary:
It is impossible to make anything foolproof
because fools are so ingenious
Murphy's Constant:
Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value
Quantized Revision of Murphy's Law:
Everything goes wrong all at once.
Scott's Second Law:
When an error has been detected and corrected,
it will be found to have been correct in the first place.
Finagle's Fourth Law:
Once a job is fouled up, anything done to
improve it only makes it worse.
Gumperson's Law:
The probability of anything happening is in
inverse ratio to its desirability.
Commoner's Second Law of Ecology:
Nothing ever goes away.
Howe's Law:
Everyone has a scheme that will not work.
Klipstein's Law:
Tolerances will accumulate unidirectionally toward
maximum difficulty of assembly.
Interchangeable parts won't.
You never find a lost article until you replace it.
Glatum's Law of Materialistic Acquisitiveness:
The perceived usefulness of an article is inversely proportional
to its actual usefulness once bought and paid for.
Lewis' Law:
No matter how long or hard you shop for an item, after you've
bought it, it will be on sale somewhere cheaper.
If nobody uses it, there's a reason.
You get the most of what you need the least.
The Airplane Law:
When the plane you are on is late, the plane you
want to transfer to is on time.
First Law of Revision:
Information necessitiating a change of design will be
conveyed to the designer after - and only after - the
plans are complete.
(Often called the 'Now They Tell Us' Law)
Second Law of Revision:
The more innocuous the modification appears to be, the
further its influence will extend and the more plans
will have to be redrawn.
Corollary to the First Law of Revision:
In simple cases, presenting one obvious right way versus
one obvious wrong way, it is often wiser to choose the wrong
way, so as to expedite subsequent revision.
Law of Selective Gravity:
An object will fall so as to do the most damage.
Wyszkowski's Second Law:
Anything can be made to work if you fiddle with it long enough.
Sattinger's Law
It works better if you plug it in.
Lowery's Law:
If it jams - force it.
If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
Schmidt's Law:
If you mess with a thing long enough, it'll break.
Anthony's Law of Force
Don't force it - get a bigger hammer.
Cahn's Axiom:
When all else fails, read the instructions.
Gordon's First Law:
If a project is not worth doing at all,
it's not worth doing well.
Peer's Law:
The solution to the problem changes the problem.
Beware of the man who works hard to learn something,
learns it, and finds himself no wiser than before. He is
full of murderous resentment of people who are ignorant
without having come by their ignorance the hard way.
- Bokonon
Gibb's Law:
Infinity is one lawyer waiting for another.
Fools rush in where fools have been before.
Rule of Accuracy:
When working towards the solution of a problem, it always
helps if you know the answer.
Inside every small problem is a large problem struggling to get out.
Spend sufficient time confirming the need and
the need will disappear.
Farnsdick's corollary:
After things have gone from bad to worse,
the cycle will repeat itself.
Law of Revelation:
The hidden flaw never remains hidden.
Langsam's Law:
Everything depends.
Hellrung's Law:
If you wait, it will go away.
Shevelson's Extension:
... having done its damage.
Grelb's Addition:
... if it was bad, it will be back.
Grossman's Misquote:
Complex problems have simple, easy to understand wrong answers.
Harrison's Postulate:
For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
If things were left to chance,
they'd be better.
Sevareid's Law:
The chief cause of problems is solutions.
Klipstein's Lament:
All warranty and guarantee clauses are voided
by payment of the invoice.
Klipstein's Observation:
Any product cut to length will be too short.
Sueker's Note:
If you need n items of anything, you will have n - 1 in stock.
Rosenfield's Regret:
The most delicate component will be dropped.
de la Lastra's Law:
After the last of 16 mounting screws has been removed
---From an access cover, it will be discovered that the wrong
access cover has been removed.
de la Lastra's Corollary:
After an access cover has been secured by 16 hold-down screws,
it will be discovered that the gasket has been omitted.
Design flaws travel in groups.
You can't fight the law of conservation of energy
but you sure can bargain with it.
Gerrold's Law:
A little ignorance can go a long way.
Lyall's Addendum:
... in the direction of maximum harm.
Gerrold's Pronouncement:
The difference between a politician and a snail is
that a snail leaves its slime behind.
When a man laughs at his misfortunes, he loses a great
many friends. They never forgive the loss of their perogative.
H. L. Mencken
Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit
the national debt.
Herbert Hoover
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